Comment Wall

 Comment Wall for Indra Lord of the Skies


Comments

  1. Hey Rohit!

    I enjoyed seeing your set up for your story book. The title used was really cool and specific! "Indra, the lord of the skies" is a unique title that I haven't seen before! Also, the image you used fit perfectly, thus the website looks settled and organized. Furthermore, I wonder what the google storybook will look like once you add a couple of stories to it! The introduction page was filled with great information. The stories you plan on writing to go along with your storybook were explained briefly, but descriptively enough to fill the reader in on what to expect! Furthermore, what if instead of telling the story through a narrator, you told it in Indra's point of view (first person.) I feel like this would help add some character and flavor to the story. Nonetheless, your project seems like it's coming together pretty well!

    Good luck!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hey, Rohit!

    I really liked your topic choice! Indra seems like such a fascinating character to me, and I ma interested to see how you spin this out over the next few weeks. I noticed that you planned on telling stories of Indra's many heroic feats. You also mentioned his flaws that make him an interesting character. I am not sure if this is in your overarching plan or not, but I really hope that you go into some detail on the character flaws of Indra. I think a lot of the beauty of works such as the Ramayana is that we really see these character flaws fester and develop, especially within Rama and Sita. These flaws sit with them until the character is forced to acknowledge them. And you absolutely have a good point in your introduction - these flaws help to humanize these characters, which helps make an unrelatable god all the more relatable. Just something to consider as you go about your writing.

    Cheers,
    Chris

    ReplyDelete
  3. Rohit,

    I'm glad that I decided to take a look at your project for this week's assignment. I like the fact that you are trying to focus on Indra. A lot of the projects in our class don't have anything to do with Indra, so I feel like you have a very unique topic that can draw a lot of people in. I feel like we weren't told too much about Indra during the epics and I feel that I can learn a lot from reading your stories. I read your introduction page and was drawn to your project. I feel like the three main stories that you want to revolve your project around will be very interesting to read. I find the conflict in the epics to be some of the more interesting plot points and I'm always welcome to read more about it. I look forward to seeing your stories in the future

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hey Rohit!
    To start, I really love how your project looks! It is very aesthetically please, that is for sure! It is very easy on the eyes and super accessible. I had not given much focus to Indra, previously, so I am glad I get to spend a bit more time with Indra's stories. I feel like I am going to learn a lot when you have your first story up! Judging by your introduction, I think I am really going to like this project. Critically speaking, I do wish your introduction was a bit longer. I am sure it is not entirely necessary, but I would like a tad bit more insight, if possible. I like how direct and to the point your introduction is, but I feel that something may be lacking.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hi Rohit,
    I really like how you made the introduction seem like Indra is speaking to us. I also like how you gave him some personality. It seems like he is a bit full or himself or big headed as you wrote in your introduction. Indra seems like a very interesting character and I look forward to reading about his adventurous stories. However, I did notice a couple things that you may want to change. The first one is in the second paragraph where is says "... even I, the Vanquisher of Vritra, makes mistakes..."I believe it should be "made mistakes" in that case. Another one I noticed is in the beginning of the fourth paragraph where it states "...as king and an journey I went..." I believe it should be "a journey" in this case. I hope I do not seem too nitpicky, and I also hope this information can be helpful to you.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hey Rohit!

    I really like how your epics of India project is developing. I think my favorite thing about it would be your title! It's different from everyone else's. Being unique is always a great way to stand out, which makes your project extremely great. Your introduction is also very strong. You did a great job laying out what the project will be about and all of Indra's characteristics. The first sentence of your introduction is perfect. I like how laid back it is with the "hahaha."Although, I feel like you could add a little bit more about Indra. I like how you say Arjuna is the son, but try going a little bit more in depth. I think a suggestion would just be to include the family and who she is associated with and why. This will help the reader get a little bit more of a background. Overall, I feel like you did a great job on your introduction and I can't wait to read a story once you post one.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Hey Rohit,
    This is my first time viewing your project and so far it looks great. I really liked reading your introduction, you did a great job diving into what your project will contain. What was the inspiration behind telling in the introduction from that perspective? Another question, what made you pick those certain aspects to explore for a story? For example, your first story will feature the fight between India and Vritra. One suggestion I might give is adding a bit more formatting wise, I feel like you are lacking in that aspect. This may change though as you develop and add your stories. You can add things such as a Table of Contents, Collapsable Texts, and more images to your project. Another thing I may suggest when you begin to add your stories is in your different author's notes describe the origins of the stories you picked. I don't really recall the different fights Indra had so you may elaborate on those. Great job so far look forward to reading your stories!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Hi Rohit,
    I like how you used the same picture for your comment wall and homepage. That was very helpful for me to know I was definitely at the right place. I am intrigued by your concept. I would love to learn more about Indra, the Lord of the Skies, so I am happy to see you are going to teach us about him! Because your introduction has so many great, vision-invoking details, like "I am the deity of storms, lighting, thunder, rain, war, and the sky itself" and "king of Svarga, or heaven" I bet you could find some really awesome pictures to accompany this page, like some clouds, sky pictures, heaven pictures, storms, etc. I think that might be really pretty.
    You did a good job at laying out your future stories' structures. I am looking forward to reading them.
    I like the way you are writing your character's perspective. It seems like it will be an amusing, interesting yet education storybook to read. I am so curious to how Queen Sachi's character with be written! Will she be a responsible, serious, mature partner who puts up with her lordly husband's antics? Or will she be a mischievous, silly, trouble-making partner in crime to the Lord of the Skies?

    ReplyDelete
  9. Hi!
    I thought that your storybook website was set up very well, I thought that it was very visually appealing. The pictures you chose flowed nicely with your stories and none of the visuals were distracting from the content of your storybook. Your use of the first person narrative was also really good. In your Author’s notes you did a really good job of breaking down what if was you were trying to convey through your stories and techniques of narration, and I think that it helped to really get the intention of your stories and to sympathize with your characters.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Hi Rohit,
    Indra and the Ants was a really funny story! I think the image you chose, a golden, gem-encrusted Indra, is a great illustration for this story, given his penchant for ostentation and his overblown self-image.
    I like how you made Indra himself narrate the story in the first person. You can hear how his voice changes as his emotions change throughout the story, especially in the beginning, when he is absolutely full of himself after having won the battle against Vritra, and in the scene where the "boy" tells him about the ants. Although the story centers around the important lesson that Indra learns, it also kind of plays out as just Vishnu and Shiva trolling their friend, which I am all for.
    Finally, I like how you ended it with Indra telling the audience that his story isn't over just yet, and that he ends up saving the day again. Even though he has changed, we still see sparks of his old self!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Hi Rohit!
    I love the beginning of your introduction story. Oh HI it is me the great Indra. I thought that was hilarious and really touches on a key point in your story. For the first story I like the little stone sculpture that is the cover photo. I don't know if it is just me but I also like when there is a picture beneath the cover that directly ties into what you are talking about in your stories. However, I will just focus on the pictures that you used as your cover photos. Well wow, the second picture is a gross scene but I think that bodes well with what you are trying to get across here. All the heads just hanging off the bodies is ewww. I love what you are doing with your storybook and I think it is a great idea with the first person telling of a story. I like what you are doing and am looking forward to seeing more of your work. Thanks.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Hi Rohit!
    To begin, I really like that you put your introduction in the perspective of your main character! I think it really allows us to get to understand how they view their own stories, which can definitely be different than how we view them as readers! As I continued reading, I really like that you stuck with that perspective, especially when Indra is reflecting on previous decisions. For example, in your first story Indra killed Brihaspathi and realized that that decision probably wasn’t the best one. I like that we get to dive a little deeper into the thoughts of Indra to understand what he is feeling, what he regrets, what he doesn’t regret. In your second story, I like how you add Indra’s honest feelings about being King. Of course, it’s great to not have to do anything for yourself and get things brought to you on a whim. I really like how you have made Indra aware of what was going on as he was reflecting!

    ReplyDelete
  13. Hey Rohit! I commented on your blog weeks ago but I just wanted to say, wow! Look how far you have come! When I first checked out your project we were just getting started with the course, but now you are close to being done with the entire storybook! I remember that your project was very underdeveloped at the start, but now I just adore the layout and the theme that you have gone with. Sort of a weird comment, but I especially love the font that you went with for your stories, it is very readable and easy on the eyes. I definitely want to come back once you add your final story to see how far you have progressed, and to see what final touches you add to your project. Overall, fantastic job, Rohit!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Hi Rohit!

    This Storybook looks good so far! I really enjoyed both of the stories. I'm only sad that the third one isn't on here yet because I was really looking forward to reading it the most. I like that you took up the character of Indra and decided to give us some stories from his perspective since he definitely is an interesting character.

    I paid close attention to the way you broke up your paragraphs this week. I didn't notice anything that needed revised there so I think you're good. Everything seemed to flow pretty smoothly for me. I would suggest adding more photos to each page though, just to add more visual appeal to your Storybook. Adding photos is also a good way to break up the text and keep your readers invested in your story.

    So far, everything looks wonderful here, Rohit. Good work and I can't wait to see where it goes.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Hey Rohit, love the design of your page and a great job on the story too. It was nicely put together and both the stories posted are well written. There are structural errors here and there but great use of first person dialogue and an interesting perspective to this story. Overall, I loved your choice of story!

    ReplyDelete
  16. Hi, Rohit!
    I thought that your story book was really nice visually as well as to read! Your page was organized really well and I enjoyed your imagery that you included. I thought that your stories were really good lengths and I enjoyed your use of dialogue in Return of the King, I thought it was really fun to read!

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Introduction to a Future Anesthesiologist

Week 4 Story: Rama and Sita